Over the last few weeks, K and I shared some LDR firsts.

Our first time flying together ☺️

Heading to Canada πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¦

The first time K met my littles

Our first Valentines Day, which began with our first hotel stay together 😏😁

This past week, we’ve endured another first.

Our first fight 😀😒

I read a quote this morning that really resonated with me after this past week of disagreements between K and myself.

Absence sharpens love; Presence strengthens it

K and I have been doing some major sharpening the last few days.

Fighting with someone you love is never easy but when your person is almost 4000km away it’s excruciating. Communicating through text can be frustrating and misconstruing. You can’t hold your partner after you’ve hurt them with sometimes senseless but more often misunderstood words.

I’ve often read that communication in an LDR is vital for long term success. But isn’t this true for all relationships?

I have a bad habit of being too cautious with my words. Spoken or written phrases can never be taken back. I’d rather say nothing in fear of saying the wrong thing. Now that I’m in a relationship where the majority of our interactions are verbal or written, I’ve had to push myself to communicate openly, honestly and sometimes even at the risk of hurting the one I love.

There are things that K and I have chosen to agree to disagree on at this point. Accepting that we are at an impasse and not getting stuck in the unending cycle of non constructive discussion is only possible because of the respect we have for one another. I admire K and her pertinacity. I do not wish to chip away at her resolve. I can not allow my desire to be right to overshadow my responsibility to care for the person I’ve chosen to love.

Communication is not one of my strong points but I am learning and growing. I’m still figuring out if being in a long distance relationship is the reason for my improved skills or if it’s simply that I’ve found the person worth bettering myself for.


4 thoughts on “LDR Firsts

  1. What a sweet and honest post- really great to read about such a happy relationship and I wish you both luck. I also just want to add that I very recently found your blog and I think that it deserves recognition so I’ve nominated you for the Liebster award! (There’s a post about this on my blog with more details if you’re not familiar with the award). Thought I’d let you know- AB

  2. I love this. I always say that “respectful” communication is key. We can’t always agree 100% BUT it’s the way we disagree that really says it all. I used to want to always be right…now I prefer peace and happiness.

  3. LDR’s are difficult but are also very rewarding. Communication is vital and reading a written text without hearing a tone of voice can be very misleading to others that didn’t actually hear the correct tone and not the tone they automatically hear themselves…assuming. Best wishes!

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